I am Kirst

Mum vs Child

2011-12-02T17:55:00.001+11:00

Move over Bear Grylls, I am taking on a tougher opponent than the Sierra Nevadas, a Costa Rican Rainforest or even the Moab Desert - I'm taking on the the 4 year old, second child.

It's that time of the year when the kids are ratty, I'm tired, and the looming presence of Christmas sets my hair on end most years (and not in a good way).......so it stands to reason that behaviour levels in the house are a little less than desirable. But what I have been dealing with lately is comparable to dealing with a stubborn water buffalo who really doesn't give a shit whether you attempt to pass it and cross the river, or stay where you are and get eaten by the crocodile that's coming down the river towards you.

Blase, disinterested, indifferent.

I can handle kids misbehaving, I run a pretty tight shop and everyone knows what is expected of them. If they step out of line, there are consequences. But at the moment its not even the misbehaviour and mischief that is the problem, it the this level of apathy that is being displayed by a 4 year old that annoys me the most. The consequences are of no consequence to her. Nothing is working.

I have tried time out, quiet time, putting her favourite toy in time out, taking toys away, explaining, yelling.......nothing works.

Here's an example of what I'm dealing with:

While getting ready for school on Wednesday, Miss B decided that it would be more fun to run around in her pyjamas than even attempt to get ready, so as most parents would do, I picked her up ready to put her in the car in her PJs.

Unfortunately for me she is getting too big for me to successfully complete such an act while she is kicking and screaming, so in fear that I may get hurt, she got a short reprieve while I did Ardyn's hair. She decided then that it might be best to get dressed, and got in the car (not without complaining all the way mind you).

Whilst in the car (and pulled over, of course) I had a bright idea and sent a text message to Santa. asking him to "please put Bailey on the Naughty List, as she does not know how to behave". I have heard that this close to Christmas this tactic can bring the best behaviour out of the worst child.

Ardyn: *shock!!* Mum? Did you really text Santa? Can you do that? (Thank God it still works on her)

Me: There you go, you're on the naughty list Bailey. Do you know what that means?
Miss B: Yep! I get potatoes instead of presents.
Me: That's right. How does that make you feel.
Miss B: Happy.
Me: Are you sure? Do you really understand what that means? How can you possibly be happy??
Miss B: I'm happy to be getting potatoes. I'm going to make mash. I like mash.
Me: *shock!!*

Where the hell do I go from there?? As much a I would like to applaud her for having her own mind, and thinking so much further outside the square than the typical 4-year-old, the back-chat is driving me MAD!!!!

Later that afternoon I asked her specifically not to do something, and she did it anyway. I am thankful that it was in front of Cal, as he always assumes that I start the process for her bad behaviour (it couldn't possibly be his princess, must be someone else's fault). She displayed a similar indifference, and lame explanation for why she did it. So we made the decision that she was not going to attend her Kindy Christmas Party/Disco Friday afternoon (today).

I have to be honest, it broke my heart to make the decision. It's easier for Cal, as he's not the one who has to follow through, and I started feeling like a bitch as this afternoon got closer. I am not going to get to see my baby girl sing Christmas Carols with her Kindy class.

Until last night. I explained to her how sad it's making mummy that we don't get to see her sing Carols, and she came back with "I don't care", and then just carried on with whatever she was doing.
This kid is 4!!!!! Where the hell does this attitude come from??? I wasn't expecting to have to deal with this for another 10 years or so.

Then late this afternoon when Ardyn said "The disco would be over now. It's so sad that we had to miss it." Bailey replied "Doesn't matter, it wouldn't have been fun anyway."
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I know I was a stubborn kid, but I was NEVER like this.Where has she learned to speak like that, as it's definitely not in our house. I would expect it more from my 7-year-old than the 4-year-old. The complete lack of disrespect stuns me!

What am I to do!!!
There was a trip to mini golf planned with daddy for tomorrow, and she has been told that she'd not going. That last comment blew us both away. She will experience what 'not fun' is tomorrow.

If anyone has some ideas, I would love to hear them.
Do you know what I would also love to hear? Support. Encouragement. Someone tell me I'm not a bad, bitch mum please. This afternoon her Kindy teacher told me how great I was doing, and that helped me through the evening. But this has been going on for a month or two, and who knows when it will stop. I am exhausted in trying to deal with it, and have run out of ideas.

I asked Cal for help, and ideas as to what to do now, and he told me "I dunno". Great! I guess it's up to me. So any ideas, help, encouragement from the mummyblogosphere would be appreciated.

K xx

Are you as busy as me???

2011-11-25T13:45:00.001+11:00

I've been doing it again this week. That thing where I have blog posts in my head, and then I never get to a computer to get them out...............and then they're gone, or irrelevant.

Busy weekend in front of me here. Lots of sequins, make up, and hairspray.

It's dance concert weekend!!!!

I'll have more to tell/show next week.
K xx

Google is good

2011-11-21T13:29:00.001+11:00

At the end of my last post you will see that my folder of November 2011 photos suddenly became corrupted and was unable to be opened. I have no idea how it happened, or why, but my first reaction was

But Google, being Google, came to the rescue.

I managed to find out how to fix it, and I actaully did!! Who needs a friggin' Help Desk when you have Google and online computer geek forums.

Now I am like:

~~Smug~~ Happy girl here now (and I will edit in those missing photos a little later - I'm on the wrong computer).

K xx

Looking back and ahead

2011-11-16T13:01:00.001+11:00

As we continue through November I can't help finding myself thinking about the year that is passing us by (too quickly if you ask me) and reflecting on events that have occurred. As with every year, there are some good and some bad, but I can't help think that I have made some major fuck-ups this year. Excuse the language, but I can't think of a polite way to put it.

Firstly, I am so proud of Cal. He has been my rock and strength this year, as he has for the last 17 years. He has worked so hard so that we can enjoy this life that we live. But a major change that he has made in the last few years has been training to compete in triathlons. He went from an overweight, office worker who enjoyed his beer at lunch, to a slim, fit, hardworking professional who runs and swims at lunch, and still enjoys his beer (although not as much or as often). He completed a half-ironman event in May, and continues to train and compete in various other events. I am so proud of what he has done, and we will all continue to support him as long as he wants to continue.

Running the Half Ironman in Port Macquarie - May 2011

My girls in January 2011

Ardyn is growing up so fast. She loves school and dance, and has a wonderful group of friends. She has had issues over the years with fears and anxieties, and earlier in the year we decided to get her some help. It turned out to be more involved than we first thought, but she has embraced this new learning process better than I thought she would, and has shown excellent progress.

First Day of Year 1 - February 2011

I love watching her grow up, and am so looking forward to meeting the young lady that she will become. Cal is in complete denial that she is growing up and still wants her to be his Princess. He needs to focus on the fact that it doesn't matter how old she is she will always be his princess.

With daddy - November 2011

Speaking of growing up, Bailey is developing at a rate of knots! She was a late talker (just like her mumma), and we always joked that once she got going that we wouldn't be able to shut her up (just like her mumma). How right we were!! I swear she is 4 going on about 26. She is cheeky, bright, inquisitive and cheeky (yes, I know!), and makes me laugh all the time.

Whistler, Canada - January 2011

We changed her Preschool this year, and she has fit in very well with the kids who have been together for the few years before. The shame is that she still has another year to go, and they all go off to 'Big School' next year. But I know that she will make new friends next year, and will love being one of the 'big kids' at Kindy. The next few years will be a big change for her, but changes that I'm sure she will take in her stride. That's just her style.

November 2011

Me? A year of ups and downs. I take the moods and troubles of those I love to heart. With Ardyn attending therapy, mum (and her sister) fighting cancer, dad being a grumpy old man......and everyday life mixed into the pot..........I found it really hard to get into a groove this year. I'll admit it, it was tough. And if you have been reading my Blog, you will know that I went through some tough personal times around the middle of the year.

My biggest regret is that I estranged a new friend through this, and although I think that my behaviour would have been something that some of my old friends would have been able to deal with, it was all too much for this new friend. And I am so sorry, as we were becoming quite close, and I can't take it back. We are still friends, but it just isn't the same. I actually grieve this loss, which is strange as we have not known each other that long, but I felt that connection. I really miss her. And not only this friend, but others who I didn't really know well enough were affected. And now to be honest, I feel like I've alienated myself from them, but I bought it on myself.

But that's in the past. I am not dwelling, just recapping. Dealing with it.

We all make mistakes, and we live with them.

Moving on.

Ardyn is going well in therapy, mum is in remission, my aunt is still fighting, and dad.............well let's face it, dad will always be grumpy.

It's time to look ahead.

(OH BUGGER!!! I was just inserting the photos in, and the file of November 2011 photos on my drive has suddenly become corrupted!!! How the hell did that happen??? There goes our trip to Qld and Cal's first Tri of the season!!!!

You will just have to imagine the photo of Cal running and the girls together.)

It's so strange to think that 2012 is just around the corner. It's almost like I can see it just over the horizon.I am looking forward to it too. There are new experiences ahead, new possibilities. I am looking forward to the challenges of life, being a mum, a sister, a wife and continuing my journey in this world and getting closer to finding out who I really AM. It seems to change so often, and although it keeps me on my toes, I am looking forward to finding out who I will be (can be) and seeing what 2012 holds for me.

Right now I am thankful for so much. Too much to list here, but in particular, Cal, my girls, Q, my health, the future, my life. I am lucky, and blessed, and thankful.

K xx

Don't judge, it's personal

2011-11-14T20:38:00.001+11:00

Anyone who knows me in real life or through my Blog knows that I am giving it a go to get rid of the last 5kgs of weight that have been bugging me for ages.

The final push was that one of mums from Kindy started "Operation Barge Arse" and asked if I wanted to join them. She was forming a small group of ladies to work together and encourage each other on their weight loss journey.At first I didn't know whether to be offended or not, as most people usually tell me that a "look fine" when I mention that I'd like to shift a couple of kilos. These women I'd never said anything to about weight, so I was offered a place in OBA just for the way I look??

Hell!!!! Does that mean that all my friends have been feeding me shit for the last few years? Could his woman read deep into my eyes and read the real truth?? I decided to NOT take it as a message that my arse is that offensive that relative strangers were intervening for the good of the general public's eyesight, and take it as an in invitation to join a group of lovely women in their quest for a healthier (and a little bit slimmer) life.

So the five of us email each other and share healthy cooking and lifestyle tips, and generally motivate each other to reach our personal goals. PERSONAL goals.

I have been reading some very inspirational weight loss stories, and have watched friend's of my own achieve some fantastic results, and I find them very inspiring - to the point that I started my own weight loss journey. But my PERSONAL successes are being a little downplayed by some.

I have a couple of comments that I shouldn't be celebrating such an "insignificant" amount of weight to lose when I am already in my healthy weight range. Apparently I "look fine". There are stories out there of SIGNIFICANT weight loss that are more inspirational.

Way to put me in my place.

Just to clarify, I am at the TOP of my healthy weight range, was 10kg heavier than where I used to be, and although I may LOOK fine, I don't FEEL fine.The way we all look and feel is PERSONAL. Whether I choose to lose some excess weight or not is my choice. MINE!!

We all go through our lives looking fine, hiding information from the world at large.......we all have stuff going on that we keep to ourselves. This particular information of mine I CHOOSE to put out there as I wanted to be held accountable. REALLY accountable.

But that's my choice, and this is my journey. I may be making it public, but it's still a personal journey, and I will not have anyone judge me for it.

Weigh in day today.

69.0kg

I'm happy. Not a lot of exercise this week, and a bit of a pizza, pasta and wine indulgence on Friday night.

Using the Weight Watchers Tracker on my iPhone is definitely a help. It allows me to see where I can make small changes and create healthier habits.

If you have a personal journey (it doesn't have to be weight-related) big or small, I encourage you to take it. Take it for you. Who cares what anyone else thinks. Take it because it will make you feel better.

Look after you.

K xx

Lost the point................

2011-11-11T14:24:00.001+11:00

Recently I have been trying to become a bit more part of the Blogosphere.

Over the years I have felt at home getting to know people through cyber-space, as I'm sure anyone reading an relate to, and have felt like my online presence has kind of been missing.

In the (distant - it seems distant) past my online presence was in the way of forums, scrapbooking and parenting forums to be exact. I have met some of my dearest friends in this way, and have been lucky enough to meet a fair few in real life. It seems strange to people who don't interact in forums/online that I can say that I have never met some of my closest friends, but I can also now understand how people can marry someone they've never met.

Scrapbooking forums were generally attached to online stores, and you were 'on' the forum if you were a customer of the store, if you were on the design team, or if you just liked the community there. It was a kind of 'home', and the members were like family. They sometimes knew you better than your own family. We shared a lot of stuff, and were all very close.

Anonymity can give you the courage to speak your mind and be yourself sometimes.

But as we all had our 'homes' sometimes you had to visit other 'homes' to chat with some friends, so a 'chat' on the forums could mean visiting 3 or 4 to catch up with the comings and going s of everyone. And then there was all the blogs to follow as most members of forums had Blogs too. (I think that I still have 1000s of blogs with millions of unread posts in my Bloglines Reader.) It was a place to go to go and catch up with one person's life, see their craft, get involved if you weren't in the mood for a forum that day................phew!! It was exhausting and getting all too hard.

Then a few years ago something happened that made it all a lot easier. A little-known thing called Facebook.

I can add everyone into my Facebook account keep up with their lives in one place. I can share my photos, let people know what I think, play games.............all in the one place. Excellent!!!!

But did you know that there are some people out there who refuse to join Facebook??? Seriously?!!??? But the people who I know who are not into it, are the type who wouldn't say that they've never met some of their dearest friends, they would never consider meeting someone online, and usually don't have a lot of hobbies that would keep them near a computer. Unlike me and my cyber buddies.

That would include my parents and my in-laws.

The main reason I started my Blog (all those years ago) was 1) because everyone else in scrapbooking had one, so shouldn't I? and 2) to keep my family and friends up to date with our lives, kids, whatever when we moved interstate. It has given them an opportunity to keep in touch without having to pick the phone up and have me repeat the same thing over and over again, and seriously anyway, who's got time to sit on the phone for that long these days???

So when my FB addiction officially went into full swing, my Blog kind of got left behind. And it's taken me this long to realise that I miss it. I miss typing out my thoughts, sharing mindless crap and annoying my family with photos, verbal diarrhea and all that boring stuff. But it gets the crappy, shitty thoughts out of my head, and I like that.

So where am I going with this? Damn! Lost it!!

This post was originally going to be about how I have been trying to get more involved in the Blogosphere, some recent post topics (or non topics) and a general chat. Instead it has turned into a little bit of a diatribe about nothing. And now I sit here not knowing where to go with it, as where I might end up would turn into an EPIC diatribe of mindless crap.

BLAH!!!!!

So I'm going to go. Go and get my kids and spend some time with them.

Let me finish by mentioning something completely unrelated.

I am going out for dinner tonight.

I know you are now going "SO?" with a very confused look on your face, but I don't get out much.

Can you tell?

K xx

Turning back time

2011-11-07T09:43:00.003+11:00

Back in the days of only having one child, weekday mornings were pretty stress-free. We got up when we wanted to, ate breakfast at a leisurely rate, got dressed when we felt like it (if at all) and had a great time just being together, playing and having fun. I loved being a new mum, spending time with my daughter and doing all the things I wanted to as a mum.

There was none of this "Hurry up and eat your breakfast!", "Is your bag packed?", "Mum!! Where's my socks!?!?" "Brush your teeth!" All while trying to make lunches, grab a quick shower and dress myself (I have learned to forgo eating breakfast at this time, I do brunch).

I sometimes feel that Bailey missed out a little, as ever since she was born, there's been some sort of 'getting ready' in the morning, and we never really get the chance to just hang out, relax and just BE. Just the two of us. Weekends don't count, there's more people around, and these days we are always rushing off to something anyway.

This morning I got a sense of what is was like all those years ago. Hang on! "All those years ago"?? It was only a couple. How quickly we forget.

"Life moves pretty fast. If you don't stop and look around once in a while, you could miss it." Ferris Bueller

Have I missed some of Bailey's life?? Did it fly past me without me even realising?? Hopefully I can make up for a little bit of it today.

Ardyn slept at a friend's house last night, and went straight to school from there. Normally I wouldn't do such a thing on a school night, but 1) I completely trust the family that she was going to and 2) her teacher can deal with the repercussions of the tired and grumpy child during the day (hehe).

So with no need to make the 9am dash to school this morning, it is just me and Miss B with nothing to do until about 11am.

O-M-G!!!! Four hours of not HAVING to do anything! It's bliss.

I have eaten breakfast (my stomach is not really enjoying it as it's not used to having something in it this early) and had a coffee without throwing it down my throat so quickly that I scald myself.

We have played games, watched a little TV, read books, TALKED (it's not often that I get the chance to just sit and talk to my 4 year old), and painted.......it's been a very relaxing.

I really do feel like some of this has passed me by. But I guess I can't dwell. It's the lot of the second child I'm afraid. I'm so glad that I don't have a third (or any plans to have one), as I'm sure I'd be so guilt-ridden about the lack of one-on-one that they would get.

Not dwelling, enjoying the morning..................................

Unfortunately the laid-back approach to the morning has allowed my head to start thinking about all the things that need to be done on the lead up to Christmas, and I'm starting to feel a little bit tense - but that's another post altogether.

Off to make another coffee, play Mouse Trap and get back into that stress-free place that I was in not too long ago.

Oh! And to top off that stress-free feeling, today is weigh in day.

69.5kg

Slowly does it, but I must admit, I do love seeing that 6 in the front again.

I am in L-O-V-E

2011-11-04T23:15:00.002+11:00

Please forgive the dodgy images. Taking pictures on an iPhone in my closet doesn't make for the best photography conditions.

This is a love that I think that most women can relate to. It's a love that's not even considered taboo these days post-Carrie Bradshaw's infatuation with her Jimmy Choos. I'm sure that we all have too many, and we just want MORE!!

Yes, I'm talking about shoes. I think that I am developing a shoe fetish.

Anyone who knows me, often sees me in these

or these

But recently I ordered these

Thank you Mod Cloth.

I was ordering a dress, and these were on sale, so I just popped them on my order. Why not?

I have never owned a pair of wedges, and I thought that it was about time. I have been looking to buy a pair of nude coloured ones, but they didn't have any that I really liked. But now I want EVERY COLOUR UNDER THE RAINBOW!!!

These shoes put some serious height on me, and are amazingly comfortable.When I had them on I could actually see onto the top shelf of my wardrobe. Normally I have to go and get the step stool that Bailey uses to brush her teeth. The platform is at least an inch, and the heel about 3....hehe. I sit here giggling at the memory of wearing them, as it seems surreal to me to be up there.

And the length of my legs????? O-M-G!!! I may just be a convert to heels permanently. They looked so long and skinny. Trinny and Susannah would be proud.

The girls thought it was so funny how tall I was, and had me put them on and walk up to Cal. Now he's just shy of 6'5" (about 195cm) and I'm about 5'6" (168cm), so I'm used to looking into his chest, or having him lean on the top of my head. But you should have seen the look on his face when he realised that my face was above his chin and that he could actually look at me. It was all very weird.

Next on my shopping list are these

And then perhaps these

I'll find those nude ones one day. There's plenty of time. I need to make more room in my closet for them all anyway.
I'm imagining something like this

or this

but somehow I think my plans may be veto-d very quickly.
Hmmm.....I have to find a way to a) buy more very pretty shoes without Cal knowing about it (I don't need the lecture about spending money AGAIN) and b) find somewhere to store them all that he won't notice.

Tell me about your shoe fetish. I know you have one. Really, who doesn't?

A new week, a new motivation

2011-11-03T23:28:00.000+11:00

Well, I got through Blogtoberfest, and am happy to report that I managed to Blog most days. Unfortunately not all, but most. Much better than my usual efforts.

Thanks for following me through October. If you have stuck around, thank you a second time.

I've been in Noosa for 5 days, hanging out with the tanned of the tanned, and the fittest of the fittest.

My husband decided to compete in the Noosa Triathlon, and I can tell you that I felt like the BIGGEST frump in town that day. There were the most amazing athletes, and their friends and families wandering around in lycra and not a hell of a lot much else.....really just a pair of runners. They are pretty inspiring athletes, and although I know that I will NEVER be as fit as some of these people, what is even more inspiring is the other people who compete.

They are not all these chiseled professionals, there were competitors of all shapes, sizes and abilities. I often wonder if I put my mind to it could I do this. Then again, I think the same thing about entering a 15km fun run, and come to the quick realisation that I don't have the motivation or inclination to do either. I am happy to be 'team mum'.

Cal's group passing the first buoy

Bailey waving to Daddy as he swims past

GO DADDY!!!

The position of "Team Mum" (sometimes referred to as "Triathlon Widow") involves supporting the triathlete through the months of training involved, making time for them with their children when they are not training, ensuring that the food in the pantry and fridge support the triathlete's diet, get kids out of bed at 4:45am on race day so that they are right there at the start to yell "GO DADDY!!!", and drag the kids around the triathlon area/town/track with a backpack filled with cameras, food, water, amusements, etc to make sure that you are many different points around the track to continue yelling "GO DADDY!!!" until he finishes.

He even manages a wave on the way past

But all of this aside, it was a fun day. The weather was great, Cal did really well and ended up with a time that he was more than happy with, and the kids really enjoyed yelling "GO DADDY!!"

He sees us

Digs in for the last 50 metres to the finish

Finished

GO DADDY!!!

For the other 4 days that we were away, I leisurely swam with the kids (read: sat on the side of the pool while they swam), ate, drank and was generally merry. I took my work out gear with me, planning to go for a walk/run on one of the days, but the weather turned crapola for the two days after the Tri - I don't exercise in the rain.

(Before we left, I did a cheeky weigh-in, and there was a 6-in-front. I wasn't getting too excited, I wasn't sure that it would last beyond the weekend.)

So today was the day that I had to face the scales.

I tell you, when I got out of the shower I could see the glare of the scales. They were mocking me. Telling me I was no good. That I had over indulged. I was beginning to wonder why the hell I would decide to start this thing the week before I was heading away. But I had to step on. I knew that the 6-in-front was gone. But how far gone was it???

One foot.

Please let it be under 71.

Two feet.

Actually, I'll be lucky if it's under 72.

Close my eyes.

Oh shit! Just get this over with!

Look down.

Open my eyes.

70.3

What?!?!?!

I lost weight?!?!? I weight less than last week!

Not a lot, but a loss is a loss. And I indulged. And didn't really exercise. And I lost.

I'll take that.

Back to the gym tomorrow.. I want a more reasonable loss next week.

Motivation.

Aarrrrggghhhh!!!

2011-10-28T22:14:00.002+11:00

Apparently she had a great night.
Really need to make that peasant top - although she wanted to go without the singlet underneath.Heaven help me.

Blogtoberfest Day 28 - The Halloween Grinch

2011-10-28T14:59:00.001+11:00

I'll admit it, I'm a Grinch. A Halloween Grinch. I don't believe it is 'our' holiday. North Americans have great fun with it and celebrate it in great style, but I just don't believe that it is an Australian holiday.

Pre-kids Cal would go and buy HEAPS of lollies for the neighbourhood kids who came Trick or Treating, and all that happened was that we were left with a MASSIVE bowl of lollies to eat for the next week or so. He has it in his head that everyone out there is celebrating, when really, not many do.

Now that we have kids, he thinks that I should embrace it for the sake of the kids.
To me, it's still an American holiday and I don't see why we need to adopt it. Even for the kids.
Every year, I do (begrudgingly) I buy lollies to save having an argument), but when someone does come to the door I refuse to answer it. This is Cal's holiday, not mine.

Last year was the first time that we really had to treat it with a bit more 'oomph'. Ardyn started school and the kids were discussing it. The school put on a Halloween Disco, and even one of the girls in her class themed her birthday party as a Halloween Disco. So I made a costume for her. For the party - and then she could wear it to the school disco. She wanted to decorate the house......how that wasn't happening any time in my lifetime.

I still bought lollies and refused to answer the door, and Cal made the decision that there was to be bo Trick or Treating, but that they could go next year.

And here we are. Halloween weekend 2011. Both Ardyn and Bailey are asking to go Trick or Treating. Cal has told me that I have to take them (apparently it's my job as a mum) which I won't. This is his holiday. I have not bought any lollies, and the hhouse is DEFINITELY NOT getting decorated.

I have however made a costume for the school disco. It's tonight, and she is yet to see it finished. Here's a sneak on our in-house dress form (affectionately known as Andrea):

I hope she likes it. I enjoy making stuff for her, and I love dress-ups. I just put it out of my mind that this particular dress up is to celebrate a holiday that I don't believe is ours to celebrate.

Please note: I have nothing against Halloween or anyone who wants to celebrate it, so I do not wish to offend anyone. That is not my intent. My intent of this post is purely to point out that my family sees me as a Grinch - I'm taking the piss out of myself.

Blogtoberfest Day 27 - STUFF!!!

2011-10-27T18:51:00.001+11:00

Do you have stuff?? We have stuff! In fact we have TOO much STUFF!!!!

I feel like 'stuff' is taking over our lives.

I had a bit of a meltdown this morning. Over stuff.
We have an approximately 40sq house (400 square feet), and it feels as though it is bursting.
I think I ranted about this only a few weeks ago, but it's come back to me and really made me feel AWFUL today.

My kids just have so much. It's almost disgusting. I feel sick at the thought of mow much we have.
I didn't grow up with this much stuff, and I don't think that Cal did either (I think it's the same with most of us), and even though it's lovely to know that we can give them all of this (stuff), I know that they can live on less.

It's Ardyn's birthday in a few weeks, and then Christmas not long after that, and I have explained to her that if we don't thin out her "stuff", she can't get anything new - it just won't fit.

I have to stop complaining and melting down, and just DO.

I am creating a list, and not the wishy-washy type of list(s) that I usually make. This list is going to be comprehensive. I am going to walk through every room of the house, imagine it how I would like it, and write down EVERYTHING that has to be done to get it to that point.

That list is then getting typed up, printed out and put on the wall for all to see. And when I find myself with a block of time to get to action, it's there. And when the kids whinge at me "What can I do?" I can direct them to the list, and they can do their bit.

Determined to get through this before Ardyn's birthday, so that gives me a deadline. December 1. One month (give or take). Time to just do it!!

Is STUFF taking over your life?? Has it in the past and you've overcome it? I'd love to know how you went about sorting through everything, especially if you involved your kids. And what did you do with the STUFF after you got it out of your house?? Help me!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Blogtoberfest Day 26 - Do you "Like" me??

2011-10-26T20:43:00.001+11:00

I am always banging on about how I come up with these Blog posts in my head, but they never make it to my Blog. Or I think of a clever comment, and a clever comment does not a Blog Post make. So I usually share it on Facebook. But what if you read my Blog (does anyone really??) and are not my "friend" on Facebook?

Well I solved that dilemma and created a Facebook page just for my Blog. I can make my clever comments without annoying my friends and family, and if they want to know more 'bloggy' stuff, they will pop over to that page, or to here.

So pop on over and "like" my page. Until I put a button thingy on the sidebar, you can find it here.

Blogtoberfest Day 25 - Weight Watchers Day 1

2011-10-25T23:26:00.001+11:00

I started today by eating a cupcake. What a way to start after my big spiel yesterday!!
To be honest, I was a little disgusted with myself. So I quickly had some watermelon. Filled up on the zero-point option.

As you probably know, Weight Watchers works on a point system. I have been allocated 29 Pro-Points a day. I have downloaded the iPhone App to track what I eat, and how many points things are. It has made today so easy. A few small changes have made he world of difference.

I drank my coffee black.
I snacked on fruit instead of baked goods (oh my dear baked goods, I am going to miss you so).
I cooked a stir fry tonight in which I usually include noodles. I cooked the noodles seperately, served them to Cal and I just had the meat and vegetables.

I still had a shortbread with my coffee.
I don't feel as if I have missed out on anything.
It was just a matter of thinking about what I actually put into me.

Small changes, and I still have 3 points left!!
I am a little hungry, and it is at this time that I would usually go and have my late night snack - so naughty - but I am going to go and have a BIG glass of water and go to bed.

Day 1 done and dusted, and I have an exercise plan for the next week waiting to be put down on paper, but that can wait until tomorrow.
K xx

Blogtoberfest Day 24 - The honest truth

2011-10-24T23:23:00.001+11:00

I have decided that it's time to get rid of "That Last 5kg". I need to be accountable to someone, and I thought that I would put the numbers out there and be accountable to my readers/friends/family.

I will post my weight here each Monday, and if it doesn't go down, I need a boot up my butt. I am expecting that from you.

Don't get me wrong, I'm not massively overweight, I could just stand to lose that last 5. And ask anyone, the last 5kgs is the hardest.

Here's the facts:

I have never been a skinny mini girl. Wen I was full-on reffing and playing basketball I weighed 63kgs. I was a size 12, and had a pretty athletic figure. I've never had a waist to speak of, I've always been pretty much up and down with not a lot of curves.
I stopped being so active (but was still playing basketball and netball), and put on a few kgs (and a set of boobs), but always stayed in the 60s. At one stage about 10 years ago I had some minor knee surgery and got up to about 73kgs, but got back down to 67kgs with the help of Weight Watchers.
When I got married in 2004 I weighed 67kgs.
I have been happy as long as there was "a 6 in front" and I was a size 12.
I barely exercise. I don't watch what I eat. I enjoy life. I have had 2 kids (BIG babies who stretched my tummy more than I would have liked), I am 38 years old and 168cms - and am still that size 12.
A few months ago I weighed in at about 74kgs. I joined the gym and started going on a regular basis, and it started coming down slowly, but I wasn't really pushing myself.
In late August I was sick, really sick, and lost a couple of kgs in a couple of weeks just being sick.
After that I stopped snacking after hours, decreased my coffee intake and increased my water intake. I try to limit my carbs and increase my protein. But I have been completely unmotivated to go to the gym, and haven't exercised in WEEKS......if I'm honest, it would have to be months. I still managed to drop a little bit, but I still have more to go.
I have nowhere near the muscle mass that I used to have, so I am a bit flabbier than I would like to be.
I have not lost any real weight in the last few weeks, but at least I haven't put anything on either.

This morning I weighed in at 70.5kg. I would like to be 65kg, but I'm not sure that I could. I'm going to give it a red-hot go though.

I joined up with Weight Watchers online. They have a 2 week free trial on their FB page and I thought "Why not?" I've got nothing to lose, except my flabby bits.

So here I go on my journey. I know that there are people out there who have so much more to lose than me, and that 5kgs doesn't seem like a reason to offer support, but we all have our happiness quotient, and this is mine. Please be my support. Help me be accountable.

K xx

Blogtoberfest Day 23 - In Pictures

2011-10-23T22:32:00.001+11:00

Blogtoberfest Day 22 - Enjoy the Quiet

2011-10-22T22:07:00.000+11:00

I walked out of the back door today to see this.

I quickly and quietly ducked back inside to grab my camera in the hope that I would capture this moment. I was not disappointed.

Once she realised I was there she quietly said, "Mum, there's a bird up there in the tree! I'm watching it and it doesn't know I'm here."

She was quietly enjoying the quiet, nature, and just BEING. I get that.
She's growing up so quickly. She GETS it.

Blogtoberfest Day 20 - Slowing Down

2011-10-20T14:38:00.000+11:00

I am always told to slow down, take it easy, relax. And I find it very hard. There is always something to do, and always something I want to do. I find that my head can run at a million miles an hour some days, and that can be a real problem, as then I start to over think things.

It's been busy the last few months, and I've enjoyed it. But this week has been different. I've slowed down.

I have no one to justify my time to. I have no one to answer to. And I am enjoying the ride. This may sound corny, but this week I feel like I'm not just existing, but actually living. For me.

It's true. Sometimes we just need to slow down and just BE.

Why rush? We don't get there any faster. We all live and learn at a pace that is the right one for us.
There has definitely been less of this type of thing

and more of this

(even if it is only in my head).

I am enjoying this week.

K xx

Blogtoberfest Day 19 - What to do

2011-10-19T13:29:00.001+11:00

I have a new laptop and printer sitting on the floor of my study. They have been there for one week and one month respectively.

I have a bookcase at the end of my study stuffed full of fabric, with a tub of more fabric in front of it.

Do I set up the computer and printer, or organise the fabric???

Blogtoberfest Day 18 - Tuesday is Bailey-day

2011-10-18T22:08:00.000+11:00

I have pretty much made Tuesdays Bailey's day this year. Every fortnight the cleaner comes in on Tuesdays and we have to get out of the house for the morning, and it is just fortuitous that it also falls on the day that she has music.

For that time between dropping Ardyn off at school and getting to music, I let her choose what she wants to do (from carefully selected options of course).

Today she chose to spend the morning at the Hills Flower Market, chasing chickens and drinking babyccino, playing with my phone's camera and generally having fun goofing around.

Then it was off to music. Her teacher LOVED her twirly rainbow skirt, and insisted she play the piano with it like this.

While we were there we found out that Bailey is going to have to move her music to Monday, so this was our last Tuesday Bailey-day. It's a little sad, but these things happen. We are going to have to mix things up a bit. Maybe we will make Monday Bailey-day?